It’s midway to Christmas and even so that you’re not able to behold the confoundingly chaotic trailer for Crimson One. The Chris Evans and Dwayne Johnson vacation motion film directed by Jake Kasdan (Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle) is about for launch on November 15 from Amazon MGM.
Beginning off with a swole Santa Claus (J.Okay. Simmons) lifting weights (to maintain these cookie energy down, presumably) with the assistance of the commander of the ELF Job Pressure—performed by Johnson as “The Rock if he have been Santa’s bodyguard”—isn’t a lot of a stretch for an motion film, positive. It’s extra the incomprehensible collection of plot slop that follows, which leaves us questioning what that is film attempting to be, outdoors of a Christmas model of Taken? The buff-butt snowmen battle scene on the seaside is simply the tip of the head-scratching decisions right here. Have a look for your self within the trailer beneath:
We’ve so many questions! Simply on this clip we get a jacked Santa being benched and kidnapped; Chris Evans (with darkish hair to sign he’s a insurgent) taking part in a man who’s each on the naughty record—but additionally a necessary a part of serving to the Rock discover his boss; magic that embiggens toys into useful real-world objects; a Krampus kink battle membership; and people nightmare gasoline snowmen with bodybuilder bods, together with ice cream scoop butt cheeks that don’t soften on the seaside.
Someway, this primary take a look at Crimson One seemingly strips its vacation film conceit of any Christmas spirit by leaning exhausting into the motion. Younger Rock’s vacation particular, among the finest Dwayne Johnson starring automobiles produced by his staff, truly captures the childlike marvel of the vacation season, which makes the shocking mess on show right here much more curious. Evaluate this to Violent Evening, one other current vacation motion film that includes a subversive Santa which nonetheless took an earnest strategy to all its seasonal lore. Right here, it’s offered as secondary joke fodder on steroids. Significantly, why do all of the Christmas characters appear to be they go to the identical fitness center? From the trailer at the least, Crimson One is giving Saturday Evening Dwell skit meets industrial motion film, with out the cleverness or coronary heart of holidays movies.
Crimson One opens in theaters on November 15.
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